| 12 letters relate to feelings - love... | Excerpt length: shorter longer | |
| Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (3 November 1881) ... it already and it will not be
news to you. I wanted to let you know that I fell so much in
love with Kee Vos this summer that I can find no other words
for it than, “It is just as if Kee Vos were the closest
person to me and I the closest person to Kee Vos,” and -
those words I spoke to her. But when I told her this, she
replied that her past and her future remained as one to her so
that she could never return my feelings.
Then I was in a tremendous dilemma about what to do. Should
I resign myself to that “never, no, never,” or
consider the matter not yet settled and done with, keep in good
heart and not give up?
I chose the latter. And to this day I do not regret this
approach, although I am still up against that `never, no,
never'. Since then, of course, I have had to put up with quite
a few “petites misères de la vie humaine,”
[life's little troubles] which, had they been written
about in a book, might well have served to amuse... | Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (7 November 1881) ... harsh and angular tone than the former.
In the first place I must ask you if it astonishes you at
all that there is a love serious and passionate enough not to
be chilled even by many “never, no, nevers”?
I suppose far from astonishing you, this will seem very
natural and reasonable.
For love is something so positive, so strong, so real that
it is as impossible for one who loves to take back that feeling
as it is to take his own life. If you reply to this by saying,
“But there are people who put an end to their own
life,” I simply answer, “I really do not think I am
a man with such inclinations.”
Life has become very dear to me, and I am very glad that I
love. My life and my love are one. “But you are faced
with a `never, no, never,' ” is your reply.
My answer to that is, “Old boy, for the present I look
upon that `never, no, never' as a block of ice which I press to
my heart to thaw.”
To determine... | Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (18 November 1881) ... and more forcefully than last
year.
Theo, I love her, her and no other, her forever. And, and,
and, Theo, although the `no, never, ever' still "seems" to be
in full sway, there is a feeling of something like redemption
within me, and it is as if she and I had stopped being two and
were united for all eternity.
Have my drawings arrived? I made another yesterday, a
peasant boy in the morning lighting the fire in the hearth with
a kettle hanging over it, and another, an old man laying
kindling wood on the hearth . I am sorry to say
there is still something harsh and severe in my drawings, and I
think that she, that is, her influence, is needed to
soften that.
Well, my dear fellow, it seems to me there is no reason to
take 'the curse' so terribly hard. Perhaps I used too harsh a
method to make Father and Mother feel something they did not
want to hear, yet is not `a father's curse' a great deal
stronger and harsher, going indeed a little too far? Enfin,... | Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (1-3 December 1881) ... I am not sorry I paid that visit. What must be done now? For
you know that I came back no less in love than I went, but not
because she had encouraged me; on the contrary, she made me for
a moment - or rather, for twenty-four hours - profoundly
miserable, but when I thought it over I seemed to see some
light after all. When I thought it over, I say, and somewhat
more seriously than romanticism or sentimentality would allow.
But it looks less and less like gathering strawberries in
spring; well, the strawberries will no doubt come in due
time.
I also went to see Mr. Tersteeg, and among the painters I
met (the merry) Weissenbruch and Jules Bakhuizen, and De
Bock.
In short, Theo, I think I shall daily become more realistic
in everything. Thank God she is something very real, too.
Mauve and Jet send you their compliments, believe me,
Yours sincerely, Vincent
P.S. As soon as Mauve allows it, I will send you another
drawing; but he says that I must keep all my studies,
... | Letter from Vincent van Gogh to Theo van Gogh (1-2 June 1882) ... be taken in by such
sharp practices.
The way matters stand with Sien is that I am genuinely
attached to her and she to me - that she is my loyal helpmate,
who goes everywhere with me - and who is becoming more
indispensable to me by the day. I feel less passion for her
than I did for Kee Vos last year. But the kind of love I have
for Sien is the only one I am still capable of after the
disappointment of that first passion. She and I are two unhappy
people who keep each other company and share a burden, and that
is precisely why unhappiness is making way for happiness, and
the unbearable is becoming bearable.
Her mother is a little old woman just like the ones
Frère paints.
Now you will understand that, given that I remain faithful
to her, I should set little store by the formality of marriage
were it not that the family does. Father, for one, and I know
this for certain, attaches great importance to it, and although
he won't approve of my marrying her, he would... | Next >> 12 results found Showing matches 1 - 5 |