Dear Theo,
Just a word to ask you whether you have received my last
letter as well as a little roll, also sent by mail, containing
a proof of a lithograph.
The reason why I can't help suspecting that it didn't reach
you but got lost, or that the letter got lost, is that I
haven't heard from you since then; and besides, today is
already November 14. For the last five or six days I have been
literally without money, and consequently I cannot go on with
my work, at least not as I should wish.
I think the reason is that you want to send me, along with
your letter and the money, the information I asked you for
about the lithographic process and the autographic ink, and
that you had to wait for it. And I hope that perhaps today it
will be explained this way.
The former, namely publications, are things which I would
certainly not undertake without consulting you, and for the
present, I do not think of it; and besides, as you know, I only
busy myself with the drawings and the artistic side of the
work, that's all. These experiments I make are certainly part
of this, however, and it is quite natural that I work on
them.
Some time ago Rappard, for instance, made similar
experiments with etchings, which also had to be printed; but
the printing an artist does is not publishing - it has nothing
to do with business, being quite a private affair. This seems
to me as clear as daylight, but, as I told you, last night (as
I had not received a letter from you) I was worrying about it,
lest you take it for quite a different kind of action.
Well, I hope it will soon become apparent that I had no need
to worry. I hope, on the contrary, that you succeeded in
getting information about the same matter, namely that you can
tell me something about the processes.
On what was left of the printing paper, I made another trial
last week with the little figure “Sorrow.” Just now
when I said that I was afraid you would suspect from my last
letter something that was not my intention, I was remembering
that I said something like: “This is what I should like:
to have some of these sheets printed at our own expense, which
would give us more prestige with the editors of the
magazines.”
Now, my idea is by no means that either you or I should
handle the business part if we undertook the printing at our
own expense. I did not and should not think of that for a
moment. I just think that when one applies for a job, it is
well to have some work to show. It saves words and is more
practical.
I don't think it improbable that some time I shall make
things which will come into the public's hands, but it leaves
me rather cold, and I don't consider it a pleasure at all.
Two reasons would force me to it. In the first place, if I
became employed by a magazine, then of course I should have to
do what is required. In the second place - something which may
come later, but which I have certainly thought about already -
if sooner or later I should have something which forms a whole
and has a purpose and expresses something, I would certainly
publish it; but never without consulting you or letting you
know, and only if I could not find anyone else to do it for
me.
Such a thing would probably cost me money rather than bring
money in; it would be for art's sake, not primarily for profit.
If I ever did it, I should let you know everything, and in no
respect, neither as to the work nor as to the publication,
would it be dishonest - otherwise, of course, I would never do
it.
So, if there were anything that you might consider as my
undertaking a step toward publication (I don't suppose there
is, but in my nervousness, as I could find no other reason, I
thought of that sentence in my letter), rest assured that this
means nothing more than experiments which anyone who etches or
lithographs, or reproduces his drawings in some way or another,
must make in order to learn the process and the effect
of black and white. If some sheet or other succeeds and the
maker prints a certain number of copies, it would be - at least
for me, and for most artists who do such a thing - something of
an absolutely artistic nature, without any relation to
commercial publication. If I didn't know from experience that
misunderstandings may arise about matters such as showing
drawings (and showing printed copies is similar), and it is
often considered presumptuous, it would never have entered my
head. Now as to the non-arrival of your letter, I must tell you
that, when I think of all your faithfulness, I am sure it
probably has nothing to do with this matter, and there must be
some other reason for it.
When I used the above-quoted sentence in my last letter,
what I meant was that someday you will see my intentions more
clearly in my drawings. In print (because of the lithographic
crayon) they are all, especially “Sorrow,” much
stronger than in the drawing. And just because the originals
are kept grey and sober, I have only to follow my study to get
vigour into my lithograph. And this is something which I should
have to point out to the people with whom I might get in touch
if I could get some work for a magazine. Well, if you have not
written, do so at once when you receive this. For I am rather
hard up. Adieu, with a handshake,
Yours sincerely, Vincent
At this time, Vincent was 29 year oldSource: Vincent van Gogh. Letter to Theo van Gogh. Written 14 November 1882 in The Hague. Translated by Mrs. Johanna van Gogh-Bonger, edited by Robert Harrison, number 244. URL: https://www.webexhibits.org/vangogh/letter/11/244.htm.
This letter may be freely used, in accordance with the terms of this site.
|