Letter 601¹
Saint-Rémy, 22 August 1889

My dear Theo,

I thank Jo very much for having written, and know that you want me to drop you a line, I must let you know that it is very difficult for me to write, my head is so deranged. So I am taking advantage of an interval. Dr. Peyron is very kind to me and very patient. You can imagine that I am terribly distressed because the attacks have come back, when I was already beginning to hope that it would not return.

It would be a good thing if you perhaps wrote a word to Dr. Peyron to tell him that working on my pictures is almost a necessity for my recovery, for these days without anything to do, and without being able to go to the room they have allotted me to do my painting in, are almost intolerable.

(Friend Roulin has written me too.)

I have received a catalogue of the Gauguin, Bernard, Schuffenecker, etc., exhibition, which I find interesting. G.has also written a kind letter, as always a little vague and obscure, but after all I must say that I think they are right to have an exhibition among themselves.

For many days I have been absolutely wandering, as in Arles, quite as much if not worse, and presumably the attacks will come back again in the future, it is abominable.

For 4 days I was unable to eat because of a swollen throat.

I hope it is not complaining too much if I tell you these details, but I do it to prove that I am not yet in a condition to go to Paris or to Pont-Aven, unless it were to Charenton. It seems that I gather dirt and eat it, although my memory of these bad moments are vague, and it seems to me there is something shady in it.For this reason I don't know what it will mean for my painting.

I no longer see any possibility of having courage or hope, but after all, it wasn't just yesterday that we found this job of ours wasn't a cheerful one.

All the same I am pleased that you have got the package from here: the landscapes. Thank you especially for this etching after Rembrandt. ² It is amazing, and yet it reminds me once more of the man with the staff in the Lacaze Gallery.

If you want to give me very, very great pleasure, then send a copy to Gauguin. Further, the brochure on Rodin and Claude Monet is very interesting.

This new attack, my dear brother, took me in the fields, on a windy day, when I was painting. I will send you the canvas, which I nevertheless finished.

And truly it was a more sober attempt, mat in colour without showing it, in broken greens, and reds and rusty yellow ochre, just as I told you that sometimes I felt a great desire to begin again with a palette as of the North. I'll send you this canvas as soon as I can.

Good days, thank you for all your kindness. A good handshake to you and Jo, and naturally to Cor if he is still there.

Vincent

[Written in the margins]

Mother and Wil also wrote me a very nice letter.

While I have no extravagant liking for Rod's book, all the same I have made a canvas of the passage where he speaks of the mountains and the dark huts.

1. Written in black crayon.
2. The figure of an angel.